Kitting goes mow

I stayed at Gage's house again last night. I neeeeed to shower. ha. I hope his girl goes to work today so I can. I think I'm going to start going to school on Friday. Well until I leave. Well actually until Christmas break. My birthday is two weeks away(: I'm watching Cat and Dogs right now. This ovie is so cute. The second one is oner the DVD too. so is Toy Story. I'm watching em with pUd he's warmed up to me a lot. I wish I didn't lose my baby. There I go talking about it again. I need to move on. it hurts though. Still /:
Oh well. I'll. Get. over. It. Hopefully soon! i'm gonna hang out with Dee on Tuesday since his poop headed self didn't answer his phone on Saturday. GAY. My back tooth hurts, well like I think I have a wisdom tooth coming in. OUCH. Whoa this movie is intence, I love it. hahaha.

Blehkk

Yesterday was Thanksgiving, I got kicked out of my house cause my mom is a super bitch. Suzie is letting me stay with her for a few. Which is awesome. I was supposed to hang out with Donte today, he was like  "Ok, well the plans weren't me, you, and suzie." I'm not just gonna be staying at her house and go hang out with him then come back, that would be weird. He's such a bitch, and he wonders why he doesnt have any friends. I dont even know why I started talking to him again. I'm gonna try and hang out with Dee tomorrow. His birthday is on Tuesday I guess, he will be twety-one. I like him. I have for a real long time now. Like last school year he told me he wouldnt date me until I turned seventeen, I wonder if that offer is still avalible cause I turn seventeen in like two and a half weeks. It would give me a reason to stay. Also if Suzie is pregnant I am goinng to stay. By the way I'm gonna go to Texas. In January. It's only $168 for a train ticket, so I can afford it after I get my birthday and Christmas money. I'm excited, like not nervous at all. It would be awesome to just pack up and start new. I'll have to get all my papers and stuff together cause maybe I can go to school there, that would be cool. Even though I dont really want to go to school. Emi is workig on getting her GED maybe I could too, even though that would be more money. My mom already knows I'm going there. Maybe she will give me some extra money. I think I can just right a check with someones checkbook and cash it like right before I go. That way I'll get some more money. Theres a few things I can do to get some cash. I've been thiking about it a lot. We are watching All About Steve right now. It's pretty good. Were at Her sisters house watching her Neice. She's so cute she is sleeping with her butt in the air. hahahaha adorable! Suzie is lookin pretty adorable too :3 lol. Well I guess I'm done cause I wanna lay down n watch this. kbye.

dsggggggggg

I didn't go to school today. Cause I was too tired.
I meant to go around lunch time so I could see my babe, I slpt through it.
Gahh I suck.
Oh and I totally got bitced out by Erik's cousin. That was great. Made my day so much better to know that all I am is a whore, and the only reason I get guys is they can be plessured.
nice.
I've only had sex with two guys.
Oh yeah I'm such a whore.
Fuck people seriously man.
I don't have to put up with this shit.

jghjfjy

Have not been on here in a few days.
I have a lot to say but I have a head ache so I'm going to just vent my biggest problem;
I miss my hair!
So much that I cry when I think about how stupid I am for cutting it.

Sneeze

Right now I'm talking on the phone with Shon. He was like my best friend when I went to Western Options. We don;t really talk to much anymore though cause he lives like 30 miles away. I used to enjoy going over to his house and swinging on his porch swing. It was fuuuuun. And we attacked each other with dandelions, that was super fun. He's a great guy. (:
School was soooo boring today.
I'm dropping out of career center. Now I'm just going to go home after lunch. Well excpet for next Tuesday, I'm going to go so I can chill with Shon at break.
In two weeks it will be the next tri will be started and then I will have school all day.
GAAY
I'm going to actually try though. Cause I need to graduate.
I guess...
It's whatever.
Friday is when Harry Potter comes out, but I kinda wanna go to the dance.
I don;t know what to do.
It sucks.
Oh and I'm going to take someones credit card and get a cell phone (:

blub

I cut off like all my hair last night. I look like a total dyke. It'll be okay though.
People at school looked at me like I was a weirdo. hahahaha. I don't care though.
I'm at Suzie's right now.
We left school after first hour and walked to my house. Jason was home. He bitched me out really bad. But any ways. I snuck Suzie in my window when Jason was in the basement. We are such rebels!!!! hahaha. We layed in my bed and watched movies. Well the begining of Transamerica, then it stopped working ): So we watched Don't Tell Mom the Babysitters Dead. It only got halfway through then stopped working, Super sadface. Then at like 1:50 we walked back to school. Then went to her house (: She bought us some Taco Bell. We went to go get her new phone and these creepy guys kept talking to us. hahaha. Well her I was just cock blockin. You know. She's my girlfriend now though<33 It made my month.
All the ladies at school are going to be sad. lmao.
But yeah Phil called Suzie and was saying a bunch of retarded shit about what happend last week. I fucking hate him, he needs to get his ass kicked. So does Dori. Just saying. Oh and this freshman on my bus. What a bitch.
Anyways!
Today was good.
Only four more days until Harry Potter, I can't wait!

GAH!

Someone seriously just IMed me with

"hey whats eriks number

it got deleted out my phone

your the only one online i know whould have it"

I started crying.

Crazyyyy

Thanks.

Life's just not fair</3
My 23 year old brother got a 17 year old girl, that he just met, pregnant.
That's not the unfair part though.
Well I guess that's unfair to her, but I want to talk about why I hate my life right now.
Sooooo, my brother, my cousin, the chick that sits accross from me on the bus, and my texting friend, are all having babies. Why does everone I know all of a suddenly get to be pregnant.
That's the unfair part by the way.
It's like God is trying to make me suffer; like, "Oh, I'm taking away your baby, and I'm going to make all the people around you preggo so you feel like shit!!!!"
Well thanks God, your doing a good job.

Squirt♥

I love my dog so much. Even though he has the worst breath I've ever smelt in my entire life. Unless it is someone who has just eaten sardines, cause that's pretty gross.
He is so cute. My dad got him for me when I was in fourth grade, for my birthday(:
He's seven years old, but he still follows me around like a little puppy.
It's a pretty snazzy pillow case there too.
hahahah, The end.
xoxo

Sundays are the worst.

I don't know what to do with myself. My room is already clean, and I'm sure no one wants to hang out with me. It's not even noon yet and I'm already debating getting drunk or not. All I have is whisky and I don't feel like going to school with a hangover. That's the only thing persuading me not to. I know someone will end up getting on my nerves and I'll get into a fight if I have one. I can't get suspended again, I don't want to let my mom down. No one is home right now. I hate being alone. I think I'm the only person I know that doesn't enjoy having th house to themselves. heh. I want someone to come stay the night with me, but I don't know anyone who could, and/or anyone who would even want to. It seems like people only come around when I have drugs or alcohol. So I usually just do it by myself now. Momma says it's the first sign of an alcoholic. I know I'm not one though, and I won't ever be.
Ohhh I got off track, I was going to talk about Sundays, or something. I can't even remember. That's the only thing I hate about writing on these things, I always end up talking about boring stuff that no one cares about. Well my therapist would probably like to know this stuff, but I can't say it, it makes me feel weird. Yet I can put it on the internet. Tisk, tisk. /:
I must be pretty messed up in the head. I'm going to post it anyways though.
xoxo

First one.(:

Hmmm, it's Saturday and I've made plans with too many people. Like normal. So I guess I'll just not talk to most of the people for the rest of the day. I'm such a bad friend. I know I am so I don't get why I don't change. Oh well. I'll get over it.
My step sisters are over for the weekend. I dislike them so much. Jason already yelled at me like 56345 times today. I wish my mom would just divorce him already.
I might go to a party tonight. I just wanna get drunk and I'm sick of drinking by myself.
I cleaned my room today. I found all the papers from my miscarriage. It made me cry. Back when When i told my mom is was pregnantmy mom said that I did it to hurt her. It was an accident not a plan to hurt her. She says everything I do wrong is to hurt her. I'm a bad daughter, and a bad friend, but I know I could've been a good mom.
It's been a month and I still cry everyday, I don't get why I lost the baby. If it was a girl I would have named her Jordynn. If it was a boy I wanted to name it after el dad. It might have been weird though cause we broke up like a month and a half months ago, but his name would have sounded cute with "Jr." at the end of it. I didn't even tell him I was pregnant.
Thinking about all that made me cry. I cry too much.
I finally got around to doing laundry today, for the first time in like four weeks.
I think I'm finally coming out of my funk.
Everyday for the past week I've woken up with blood all over my mouth and nose. I need to stop snorting but it makes me feel better. I like feeling better.
I say all that like my life is horrible. It's not though. Just the majority of it. The rest is great. I have great naps at school, great naps at home, and great times at Otto's house.
I'm sure my life is better than some people's so I really should stop complaining. I just needed to get some stuff off my chest. I could probably write a book with the stuff I have left to say, but I'm going to be done for now.
xoxo